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It's my birthday, motherfucker.

The hat Sila knitted for me!
Originally uploaded by Hollis Maria Orlando.

22 years and I still don't own a gun. Peep the pup in my lap, Angus McBeef, the original gangster and the first male to be welcomed into our family in 9+ years.

Life is good.

Things to look forward to.

On my twenty-second birthday (01/08/2007), I will be getting my first tattoo:
He thrusts his fist against the post and still insists he sees the ghost.

The first sentence I had ever read that ellicted a shiver along my spine in the first book that ever caused me to sleep with all the lights by my favorite author. It'll be the first present I've ever given myself.

This fucking killed me. I died.

You Know You're Italian If ...

1. You have at least one relative who wore a black dress every day for a entire year after a funeral.
2 You spent your entire childhood thinking that what you ate for lunch was pronounced 'sangwich.'
3. Your family dog understood Italian.
4. Every Sunday afternoon of your childhood was spent visiting your grandparents and extended family.
5. You've experienced the phenomena of 150 people fitting into 50 square feet of yard during a family cookout.
6. You were suprised to discover the FDA recommends you eat three meals a day, not seven.
7. You ate pasta for dinner at least three times a week and every Sunday.
8. You grew up thinking no fruit or vegetable had a fixed price and that the price of everything was negotiable through haggling.
9. You watched Lawerence Welk and Ed Sullivan every Sunday night.
10. You were as tall as your grandmother by the age of seven.
11. You thought everyone's last name ended in a vowel.
12. You thought nylons were supposed to be rolled down to the ankles.
13. You were suprised to find out that wine was actually sold in stores.
14, You never ate meat on Christmas Eve or any Friday for that matter.
15. You ate your salad after the main course.
16. You thought Catholic was the only religion in the world.
17. You were beaten at least once a with a wooden spoon.
18. You thought every meal had to be eaten with a hunk of bread in your left hand.
19. You learned to play bocce before you went to school.
20. You can understand Italian but you can't speak it.
21. You have at least one relative who came over on the boat.
22. You grew up calling the bathroom the baccausa. And you had only one.
23. You were suprised to learn most kitchen utensils had another name which didn't end in a vowel.
24. All your uncles fought in a World War.
25. You have at least six relatives named Tony, Jack or Dominic.
26. You have relatives who aren't really your relatives.
27. You have relatives you don't speak to.
28. You drank wine before you were a teenager.
29, You relate on some level, admit it, to the Godfather and the Sopranos.
30. You grew up in a house with a yard that didn't have one patch of dirt that didn't have a flower or vegetable growing out of it.
31. Your grandmother's furniture was as comforatable as sitting on plastic. Wait. You were sitting on plastic.
32. You thought that talking loud was normal.
33. You thought that cookie cakes and the Tatantella were common at all weddings.
34. You thought everyone got pinched on the cheeks and money stuffed in their pockets by relatives.
35. Your mother is overly protective of males in the family, no matter what their age.
36. Every lunch meat you ate ended in a vowel.
37. There was a crucifix in every room of the house, including the cellar.
38. There was a saint in a bathtub in the yard.
39. Boys didn't do house work because it was women's work.
40. You couldn't date a boy without getting approval from your father.
41. You know what lemon ice is.
42. You called macaroni "pasta."
43. You have one irrational fear or phobia which can be attributed to your mother.
44. You know what a "goomba" is.
45. You have ever lamented your inability to find good cannoli.
46. Your mechanic, plumber, electrician, accountant and travel agent are all blood relatives.
47. Your 2 best friends are your cousin and your brother-in-law's brother-in-law.
48. At least 5 of your cousins live on your street.
49. All 5 of those cousins are named after your grandfather.
50. You call your grandmother Nona
51. Plastic on the furniture is normal
52. You get irrationally upset when someone pronounces it "Eye-talian."
53. There were more than 28 people in your bridal party.
54. You have ever been in a fight defending Sly Stallone's thespian greatness.
55. You have more than three relatives named Tony, Rocco, Carmine, or Sal.
56. You know how to pronounce "manicotti" and "mozzarella."
57. Somewhere on your parents' property, there is a bathtub Madonna.
58. You have a St. Christopher medallion in your car.
59. Your mother/aunt/grandmother prays to her patron saint to help her find her keys
60. You build your house with 3 materials.... brick, brick and wrought iron.
61. Youve been hit with a spoon and/or you've been hit by a nun
62. When you were growing up, you thought that all wine was red and that it only came in gallon jugs
63. You only get one good shave from a disposable razor.
64. You have at least one sister or cousin that went to Beauty School.
65. It is impossible for you to talk with your hands in your pockets.
66. You could never go on the Atkin's diet, because it would require giving up pasta.

Those that are bold are things I have experienced on a regular basis.

3 1/2 years later.

This is the last post I will ever make from mine and Doug's apartment.

We hand in the keys today and he goes to live with his sister in Royal Oak and I go back to living with my Mom.

Regression is a bitch.

Me and my Dad on the phone.

Holly: Where are you?
Dad: At Saint Angela's. Emily [my niece] had her Johnny Appleseed recital today.
Holly: Yeah?
Dad: Yeah, did you know Johnny Appleseed was a real guy and not just a story?!

Sometimes I luff my Dad.

C is for College Education.

I have almost 3 hours between two classes so I went to McDonald's (On 12 mile at Hayes) to grab a bite and was so fucking bored out of my mind, this was created.

Fat girl at McDonald's. Anyone surprised?
Also, if you don't want to watch me being awesome, take me off your fucking friends list and go eat dog shit.

Big shoulders?

Japanese fan girl.
Originally uploaded by thecolourweareborntomourn.

No. 232 of the reasons I rock.

Big shoulders?
Originally uploaded by thecolourweareborntomourn.

New flickr update!

Originally uploaded by Hollis Maria Orlando.

Diet Pepsi and chocolate.


Things I don't quite understand.

I am sitting in the library, attempting Math homework, and a brass band is practicing 15 feet away.

WTF, Macomb? WTF.

Also, I wrote an 1100 word essay on how to make Nissan instant ramen noodles. I rule at life.